6/22/12

I always thought that it was painful leaving friends for 2 weeks to come here or 3 weeks for camp or a summer vacation but I never could have prepared my self for this. We went to the market first to buy things for our "going away" party at the orphanage. We were going to make them fried chicken, corn, rice, and some salad with a nice desert. While at the market I bought 5 bracelets to give out constantly thinking about who to give them to. While Mrs. Gutmann, Meng and the rest of the group and I went to the market Lisa Marie went and bought a huge picture frame and developed about 250 pictures.
Like usual we were greeted at the orphanage with big smiles and hugs. Jack, Jamie, and I went to go start taping and arranging the pictures in the frame because SomAn had told us that was what she wanted. We finished in time to see their beautiful dances. CPO makes money by being hired to dance at wedding and other events and I was amazed it was one of the most beautiful dances I have ever seen and brought us all huge smiles. After the dances we all had a dance on the stage and played volleyball and just tried to make the most of the last day. Pretty soon it was dinner time and the kids were over-joyed with the meal we had brought for them and most went back for seconds and sometimes thirds. Then we brought out desert and they all scarfed that down too. After dinner their stomachs all hurt from the food! But they still managed to have one final dance party. It was darker and we had music blasting and it was the best dance I have ever been too and probably the best there will ever be.
All the sudden Lisa Marie started coming around and telling us 10 more minutes. We were devastated and so were they. That's was when the tears started rolling and the goodbyes became more real. One of my favorite girls, Srey Na, ran over and asked if I was coming back tomorrow and that was when I lost it looking in her eyes and seeing the pain as I had to tell her that I wasn't coming back and I had to go home broke my heart. I gave her a bracelet and she looked at me and replied "Will you be my sister?" I said yes and we both just held on to each other. I gave bracelets to Bun Bun, Srey Mi, Srey Ti and Heang. Heang was just sobbing into my shoulder as I just sobbed into his. He is my brother too and I will never forget him the sweetest boy you could ever dream of meeting and I had to leave him. I looked up and all I could see was people sobbing in pain because they were saying goodbye.
Then there was Narron. I had been looking for him and I found him in the back he just had one tear rolling down his face and picked him up and wiped it away. I told him I loved him and that I would find a way to see him again. I had to set him down for 1 minute so I could hug Bun Bun goodbye. When I turned around Narron had his hands up so that I could pick him up again. When I did he just started balling into my shoulders and wailing I hugged him as tight as I could we just held on balling into each other. When the time came to start walking out Narron's older brother came to get him and he wouldn't let go. Srey Na grabbed hand and walked me out crying when we got outside she handed me her tiny stuffed animal and looked up and said I love you sister and I will never forget. I could hardly talk between sobs but when I could I told her I would never forget her and I loved her. I went to give Narron one more kiss on the cheek and hug and he couldn't let go when I did he told me he loved me and couldn't stop the tears because he barely knows any English and to say that made me want to pick him up and never let go. I gave him to his brother and waved goodbye as he did too. The tuk-tuk started pulling away and I had a hold of Srey-Na's hand and didn't want to let it go she ran next to the tuk-tuk for awhile but when it was time she told me once more that she loved me.
You never think that over a two week period of time you can create such a powerful connection with so many kids. I am leaving Cambodia knowing that I have left a part of me and a part of my family behind. I love them.

All changes are more or less tinged with melancholy, for what we are leaving behind is a part of ourselves.

~Amelia Barr

6/17-6/18-6/19

6/17:
Today, we went to CPO in the morning and played with the kids and worked on some of the projects and as always the kids had huge smiles on their faces the whole day. Just seeing them smile makes me and the other volunteers melt with joy. Just before we left we all had a huge dance party and it was the best dance I've ever been to! The kids were laughing and smiling and so were we! Everyone was having so much fun and no one wanted it to end. The kids almost live by the quote "Don't cry because it's over smile because it happened" because when the dance party ended they were still smiling and so were we. During the afternoon we went to CHA. We played with the kids for awhile and also deloused their hair which was fun for them and us and they enjoyed the head rubs immensely. The facility where CHA is, is very different compared to CPO but still filled with smiles and joy. There were only about 20 kids but it was still so much fun to play with them and even though it was short we made it last and we left them with a sense of love and care.
6/18:
CPO is always filled with smiles and joy and always seems to find ways to inspire me and fill me up with joy. Whether it's Nyron giving me hugs, smiles, and laughter or Srey Na giving me picture that say "I Love AJ" they always find a way to make me feel special and happy.
We always knew that signing up for this was a trip to help teach them and give to them but you never expected to learn so much and be helped just as much as you are helping. What I am taking home with me on this trip is a whole new perspective on life, living and day by day tasks and opportunities. All that these kids give me is to much to even describe because it's a new experience.
As far as work goes, today we hoed and raked and cleared about a 15' by 15' square of grass so that the kids and directors have more room to plant morning glory and other various plants to eat so that they can have more portions and more space to have. We still had about a hour left to finish clearing the space but decided to wait until tomorrow morning and play with the kids and eat for awhile. Monday was a holiday in Cambodia so none of the kids had school and we wanted them all to play and do no work. In this case a regular  kid would pounce on the chance to rest and play... Not these kids they constantly asked if they could hoe for us because we were sweaty and hot even after we said "no no it's a holiday it's a holiday!!" they still watched and asked. 
The children's school is about a two minute walk into the slums where they do not have to pay to go but instead are rewarded for coming at all. When they first set up the school because it was free none of the kids would come because they didn't have to so they set up a system. Each kid that comes for the whole week gets 2 kilos of rice every Friday and that seemed to keep the kids coming back to school. 
The kids always amaze me at there ability to see the light in every situation and always smile about. They say we inspire them but really we are the ones who are inspired. 
6/19:
Aster playing with the kids for about 30 minutes Gena, Creek, Nicole and I went to finish hoeing the space for them this time we went in with a system so we could go fast. We would do it in rows Creek and I  hoeing, Gena raking, and Nicole picking out the little pieces of grass after. After about and hour and a half we finished and the kids were there to see it immediately. They were all so thankful for the new space and it made the work and sweat well worth the while to see them and the director, Soman, so excited and happy. We played with them for awhile and handed out clothes to the kids today which once again made them so thankful and happy. After awhile we took a few of them to this tiny, tiny little store and we each took a buddy or two. I got 2 packs of these little chip like things for Nyron, 4 packs of little chocolate angry birds (they LOVE angry birds), 3 Khmer writing notebooks, and 8 angry bird pens for a few of the kids all which totaled up to be $2.50! The kids loved it all treated it like they got 1 million dollars. We went back to the orphanage and started to play a game of volleyball (which all the kids are scary good at!). I took Nyron off to the side and gave him 500 Riel and he ran down to the market and got a big juice bag of O.J. which he thoroughly enjoyed and shared with his 8 other siblings; Srey Mi, Srey Ti, Panat, Hein, and 4 older men who work there. To these kids the smallest thing to us is the world to them and it brightens my day to see them happy and wish I could do more to make them happy.0.

6/15-6/16

          Time is flying. I can't believe that we only have a week left or that I will be leaving all the orphans they have all made such a special place in my heart that can never be filled by anyone but them. Each day is filled with fun and work and I couldn't be happier doing it; the smiles it puts on these kids faces is priceless. On friday Gena and I cleaned their "bathroom" which was a hole with two places to put your feet on... as you can imagine it was very dirty and it was partially clogged and although it was dirty I wouldn't take it back for anything because the kids thanked us thousands of times after and made me and them happy. Each day I go Nyron (who we thought was Arron until his older sister spelt it for us!) is sure to greet me with hugs and laughter and Ja-Heng is sure to follow. Playing with these two little boys makes me the happiest person alive. All I want to do is just snatch them and bring them home!
          Yesterday we went to the slums and it was so sad to see people living like that. Homes literally the size of a master bedrooms bathroom for maybe 4-5 people sometimes more sometimes less. All these homes packed into one little area and all made of sheet metal and plywood. Some of the kids in the orphanage have homes/parents in the slums but the parents are unfit to take care of them either because they have another child, they can't feed them or in most cases the mom has HIV/AIDS. Nyron has a home in the slums which I have not been to but I know he does because he goes over there spyratically throughout the day. It just breaks my heart to know that that is where some of the kids lived and many more around the country too.
          On Friday we deloused almost every kids hair and each voulenteer haad a different job. Shampoo, rinse, or comb. I was at the shampoo station and first hand saw how much lice the children had. You had to scrub and lather their hair for at least 10 minutes and some of the girls had very long hair which is very beautiful but very hard to scrub :) you had to get the back of the scalp and right behind the ears. Almost every kid had lice the only two who did not were Ja-Heng and Nyron! But one girl had lice so bad that she had twelve sores all over her head either form her itching the lice or from the lice biting her so much, she had it the worst and we still don't know if we got it all out. But even after we scrubed, combed, and rinsed their heads they were still full of love and very thankful.
           They have never siezed to amaze me by how much compassion they have. You can give them 1 single starburst and they act like you handed them a million dollars. Every little tiny thing you do for them they are so grateful for and I wish that I was more like that and that everyone else was too. They don't even have running water! I have no idea how I am going to be able to leave these children in a week or so I have grown so attached to all of them and love them all. They have all taught me more than I could ever learn at home and I am so thankful for them and for being here.

6/14/12- The Orphanage

Today was the first day that we went to the orphanage where we will be doing majority of our work, it is called C.P.O. It is not in the city so it is a bit of a drive to get out there but espicially by tuk-tuk, the whole entire ride I could not wait to meet them and share my love with them. I wanted to know what they were like, how many there were, and what we were going to do to help. As soon as we got there we were greeted with huge smiles, hugs, and laughter. When I got out two girls instantly ran over and hugged me and took my hand and guided me to where I could put my bag down. The first 15 minutes was introductions and finding out names and age, which was a little difficult because most only knew how to say "Hi my name is..." and nothing else in English but the language barrier was not an issue to them or us. As we started to get to know each other the more and more games and fun we shared. We played alphabet games, counting games, and other fun little games. While we played with them Lisa Marie and the other adults (including the translator, Meng) talked to the woman and man that owned the orphanage about what we could do to help. They came to the conclusion that we would get them a new running water source which they had never had before. We would also extend the roof so that when it rained the kids wouldn't get soaked, we would rebuild the chicken coop, pick up all the trash, organize the place, and delouse all the kids. In the process of all this I met two little boys who instantly melted my heart with their smiles and love. Their names were Ja-Heng who was 6 and Arron who was 5. I played with these two little boys for the mojority of the day just playing games, playing soccer and volleyball and just sharing laughs. We arrived at the orphanage at 7:45 and didn't leave until 5:00. Every second I was dreding leaving these two little boys and all the orphans. But when the time came we got so many hugs and love and as we were driving away in the tuk-tuks all the kids starting running after us for awhile waving and smiling. It made my heart melt and I can never ever forget today.

Day 1: Orientation and Khmer Rouge S21 Prisons and the Killing Fields

Today, we had orientation at the Star Kampuchea center. It lasted for about half the day going over cultural dos and don'ts, the language, the history, and some quick team building games. The culture here is so different and it is something to honor and respect. Some things are great like their respect for each other and some things are a little crazier like the driving... It is so much fun but also a little scary! On the way to the Star Kampuchea center from the Tat-Too guest house we sat in the back of a truck, here in Cambodia there aren't really speed limits and no one really cares about stoplights so it is a free for all of honking and shouting! But thats not what we are here for and before we could begin to work with these kids we had to learn more about why most of them are even there, Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge. We went to the S21 prison where prisoners were kept, tourtered, and even sometimes killed. Walking around through the cells and looking down at the floor and seeing blood stains all over brought me to tears. The women who was doing our tour had been victim of Pol Pot's plan but luckily escaped to Vietnam, but others in her family weren't so lucky. Her Dad, brother, and sisters were never found but they knew had been killed. After this we went to the Killing Fields were most of the prisoners were killed and tourtured. Both of these sights were extremely sad but the scariest part to me was that it only happened 37 years ago... Not long at all and it shows that this could still possibly happen. After that we went to the Olympic Stadium and watched a soccer game for a little but then did an 80's style work-out it was so much fun! When our work-out finished we walked around the stadium and on the other side of the stadium there were about 4 trampolines linded out we decided we would try them out. After asking the man we realized you jump as long as you want for only 50 cents! How many people can say they've jumped on a trampoline in Cambodia?! Not many. Although today was so much fun I am even more excited to go to the orphanage tomorrow to work with the kids!

Airplane Rides... 2 Days of travel!

The flights went from Denver to San Francisco, San Francisco to Seoul, and finally Seoul to Phnom Penh! Denver to San Francisco was about 2 and a half hours, the flight was not that bad because it was short but I couldn't sleep because I was to excited. San Francisco to Seoul was about 12 hours... I have never been on a plane this long. I sat in the middle seat next to Gena who was on the window. I slept for maybe 3 out of 12 hours because once again I was to excited. Seoul to Phnom Penh was about 5 hours and again I could not sleep because me and Gena could not stop talking about what it was going to be like and our excitment. Finally when we arrived in Phnom Penh they had a van waiting for us which we had to pack full of all our bags and our donation bags. I was speechless on the ride from the airport to the Tat-Too Guest House. I couldn't believe it... I was finally here in Cambodia, half way around the world ready to do whatever it takes to leave these kids with them knowing someone loves themm and someone cares.

First Blog

21 days until Cambodia... I can not wait. This trip will be life changing and a trip I will always remember! I can't wait to go and experience the love the children have to offer and for them to experience the love we can offer. Going half way around the world is not something many 14 year old can say they are going to do and I'm honored to be one that can say that.